Edie, you are a professional and a mother. How could you?

How could I religiously watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey? I’m a feminist. I’m a criminal defense attorney. I typically cringe at television shows that depict women as frail, dumb, boy-crazy, inept, greedy or shallow. Such women are pathetic. Such women have TERRIBLE taste. They literally get into fistfights in front of their young children. WTF, Edie? WTF?

I can’t get enough of this show.

Perhaps it’s the defense attorney in me. Throughout each episode, I find myself thinking about the various crimes these women could be charged with and convicted of: child endangerment, DUI,  fraud (declaring bankruptcy while driving a Mercedes, keeping a hair and makeup person on staff, living in a 10,000-square foot god-awful mcmansion), assault and harassment, to name a few.

Perhaps it’s the fact that the show confirms my theory that mothers who find ways to talk about their incredible mothering skills are in fact the very worst mothers. Am I really the only one who hates Caroline?

Perhaps it’s the fact that I feel better about myself as a mother whenever I tune in to this show.

Perhaps it’s that age-old quote “you can’t buy taste.”

Perhaps it’s the adorableness of gay, Jewish, Andy Cohen attempting to “moderate” these nutjobs.

Or perhaps it’s simply the opportunity to dish with my dear friend, the incomparable Scented Glossy. 

Or perhaps it’s just about my hatred for Caroline and my love for Jacqueline (the only semi-normal woman in the bunch).

Regardless, I profess to you all: This professional, educated, mother loves me some Real Housewives of New Jersey. 

See you at the reunion show!